So, some news:
First, there have been enough whispers that it’s necessary for us to get a facebook page. Please join Upscaletees there—we’ll post a link when it’s up. We “like” that.
Second, we’re redoing the designs a little. Feedback tells us that although people like that plucky sturgeon, he’s too big on the shoulder, and there will be some changes to the lowball lineup, too. So, we’re going to shrink him down on all future shirts, and redesign the designs we’ve already released. On the one hand, this means your Upscale is going to look different from all future Upscales—people will be confused: ‘what kind of Upscale is that?’ they will ask. On the other hand, you basically got in on the ground floor like a cool kid. You have the collector’s upscale. (The Upscalest Upscale?)
So, do whatever you want with that news. If you’re thinking of buying 100 Upscales, you might want to wait. Unless you really, really want the big shoulder collector’s style. (Then you should buy 200.)
Third, the promotion, that you can still get tees for the starting price of $85 has been extended. It’ll end once the redesign is over, and prices will resume appreciating as usual, at the fully appreciated rate.
Also, new designs are coming soon, fourth.
You may have heard a grumbling, mumbling, rumbling around the internets that price changes were afoot at Upscale. This is true—grumble no more, friends. Here’s a summary of changes:
- Upscale is still ridiculously expensive, and will continue to get more ridiculous, more expensive, and more all around awesome as time goes by.
- Lowball prices have moved lower. Previously, a lowball tee would set you back $45 bones. Now, they’ll be in the $20s range.
- Most Upscale designs will also have a Lowball twin, featuring the same design but with the brand “Upscale” added prominently to the front.
Whoa, wait, why? Turns out, after much research, this is better for everyone:
- For Upscale People: This makes the continuously appreciating Upscale brand now even more Upscale. The bonus is that now, with more people walking around wearing Lowball shirts, more people will be looking us up, and will know exactly how much you paid for that shirt. Your investment gets more notice, which makes it an even better display. Great.
- For Lowball People: People who don’t want to pay for appreciation but still like our style, fine, you can afford our shirts now—but you pay the difference between the $85 and the $30 by advertizing for the Upscale folk in group 1. That seems like a fair trade to us—especially if you’re attractive and cool. Oh, and of course, if you don’t want to advertize, you can still upgrade to Upscale. Buy the unbranded, switch team, and people will again know that in addition to having great taste in shirt design, you are also an Upscale baller.
- For us: We get dollaz, thanks.
See? Everyone wins.
Anyway, expect Lowballs to begin rolling out soon at the new prices.
November’s Upscale tees are all themed off Aesop’s fables, all of your favorites, including your favorites you’ve never even heard of before.
Have you seen our first? It’s the heart-wrenching story of an angry yet gentle terrier, whose malicious owner hid his favorite ball far away from him. As we all know, terriers aren’t allowed on the table. What’s an upscale pit bull to do? This, that’s what.
Well, even better—in November we’re launching a massive expansion of our Lowball line and some big pricing changes. Join the mailing list to stay updated on the upscalest developments.
Prices have again appreciated for the month of November. Enjoy your Upscales.
- New tee is posting tomorrow, September 20th.
- September vintage closes when the new tee opens.
- Our post schedule is 1st, 5th, 10th, 15th, 20th of each month.
- Subscribe to the twitter feed—that’s where we’ll notify our fans of sweet deals. We mean really sweet. Like giveaways.
Puns. Riddles. Good designs start with clever things like these. Best are things that seem at first glance dissonant or downright weird, but are folded up so that upon further inspection they reveal a kind of deep sense, from fuzzy and hazy mental associations that you can’t quite root out.
You look at it, and you know there’s something but can’t be sure to say what. That’s what meaning means. That’s how thinking starts, before we solidify our associations. But the start of a thought is always something new and beautiful–and the feeling is always like the feeling of when you first get a pun or a joke—isn’t it?
Let’s create that, and let’s wear it.
So, please, submit to me your favorite pun or a riddle, something that means something or that means many things or that means everything. Maybe it will turn into a design.
Here’s the submission page.
September 1st is here, along with a new design. August’s vintage has appreciated, now $95.
September 1st is the first Appreciation Day for Upscale tees. To celebrate, we’re going to add a bonus to our early vintage designs.
That is—we’re new, and not enough people know about what we’re doing yet. So rather than raising our prices immediately, we’re going to implement a grace period. Designs will still appreciate in the background, but will be sold at the $85 “shadow price,” until the appreciated price kicks in.
So, until January 1st, you can continue to buy Upscale August, September, October, November, and December vintages at the $85 price–but once January hits, they will resume the proper appreciated prices of $135, $125, $115, $105, $95 respectively—right where they should have been—giving you more time to buy low and wear high. This is our way of saying “thank you” to our current fans, and “hello” to everyone new.
Also, if you already bought an early edition Upscale design this month, and were expecting to show off a shiny $95 shirt in September, for every design you bought, we’ll send you another of your choice for free—from August or September. That way, come January, you’ll get double the appreciation.
So, enjoy the bonus, and thanks again.
No new tees will be posted this month—they only get more expensive from here.
If you want this month’s stock at the opening price, buy before September 1st, when the current vintage appreciates and September 2010 upscales debut.